


Starry Eyed

by Smol_giant



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Friends to Lovers, Langst, M/M, The Author Regrets Everything, i'm sorry hance doesn't deserve this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-18
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-11-15 13:39:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11232147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Smol_giant/pseuds/Smol_giant
Summary: So they sat there. Fingers intertwined as the sun fell over the horizon, not uttering a single word. It wasn’t needed. Suddenly, home didn’t seem so far away anymore.--In which Lance misses earth, but is grateful to still be with Hunk





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this started out as a creative writing piece for my level three portfolio 'write the first chapter of a novel' (the first chapter i handed in being chapter one and two) but in the end I got a little ( a lot) carried away
> 
> I realized slowly that unless I wanted to give my teacher 15 pages of fanfiction for my chapter, i'd have to cut it down and cut out the ideas i had to continue what i got down lmao.
> 
> So here it is (yay) and I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this! (who knew homework could be so fun? lololol)
> 
> It would also be lovely if you could tell me what you liked and didn't like about these chapters, so I can learn and improve in the future :)

Lance couldn’t remember when he met Hunk, but he’s almost certain he can remember everything in between. From scraped knees, and walking home together in the rain to late nights together with hushed voices. Back when they were both starry eyes and ready to take on the whole world together, with little thought to any consequences. 

They certainly had been through a lot together.

Not all of the time had been, but definitely most of it. Even the times that weren’t necessarily great, they all had an element of humor, an element of childish joy and a positive outlook on most things.

Like that time when Hunk fell out of the old willow tree in the school playground, breaking his leg in a ‘who can climb the tree fastest competition’ he might have broke his leg but hey, he won, and that’s what really count’s when you’re a competitive seven year old. The Nights huddled together under blankets during storms, Lance was afraid of the thunder at first, but it grew into a tradition of some sort over time. Lance still sometimes seeks out Hunk during stormy nights just for the sake of the good ol’ days of video games and pillow forts, hushed whispers and giggles at midnight. Weeks when the two of them were nursing colds together, because of course they got sick together, it was hard not to when they were glued together at the hip like they were. Days of playing at the beach together followed by days of sunburn and attempting and failing to get the sand out of their shoes. Of sleepovers and midnights snacks. Of acting out comic books and playing superheros together. Of daydreaming about their futures together. Would they stay friends? Of course they would! The two of them were a team! Player one and player two! Lance and Hunk! And so they did.

How long ago had that been? Funny how everything can change, but some things stay the same, no matter how fast time moves on.

Had been years ago? Maybe even decades, but who was counting? It’s not like Lance had easy access to a calendar, when Lance last asked Pidge, she started talking about Einstein or relativity or something, whatever that means, so he just zoned out and forgot why he was asking in the first place. It was probably for the best that he didn’t know.

It is one thing to linger on memories of sunsets and rocking chairs looking out onto the beach, listening to his little sister Maria stumble over words as she recalled her day while he braided her hair. Or those nights Hunks older brother would pull out the old family cookbook, and they would bake until the early hours of the morning, with rays of sun peeking through the tiny kitchen window, or until Hunk’s mother would wake up from their not so quiet whispers and order them to bed again. It’s one thing to think about what was and what could have been, that is until thinking about these things become less of a nostalgia hit and something more painful.

Lance should probably stop thinking, because it is most definitely venturing into the more painful side of things; because he misses home. While Lance knows that avoiding your problems and insecurities isn’t really the best way to tackle things first hand, he is also aware that there isn’t a lot he can do about missing home right now.

Things had moved so quickly, and maybe that was why Lance was stuck between a rock and a hard place when it came to thinking of home. He never even got to say goodbye. His last words to Maria had been something along the lines of ‘stay out of my room you little gremlin’ and while that had all been fun and games at the time, is that all Maria had to remember him by? Blurry nights of reading together and silly insults? She was only six when Lance left. How old would she be now? Ten? Sixteen? Who knew- certainly not Lance who now wishes even more than ever he listened to Pidges relativity talk enough to understand how much time had passed on Earth.

If he knew that he was going to be swept into an intergalactic space war when he had left to train at the Garrison, Lance would have most likely stayed at home.

While being a hero slash astronaut was great and all, and pretty much his dream growing up- wasn’t it every kid’s dream?- it was definitely more than he had bargained for. Dreaming of damsels in distress, and spaceships and stars is all fun and games until you take a moment to consider the consequences. Although it wasn’t like any of them exactly had the time to think about what was happening until it was done. What was originally a night of Lance and Hunk snooping on their classmate Pidge, turned rapidly from giggling at their conspiracy theory obsessed pal into being forced into the suffocating reality of uncovering the corrupt secrets of the Garrison. 

Turns out Lance was right about Iverson being a shitty person, Not that he had anything like this in mind. What Lance had meant by shitty was picking favourites in class. Not covering up what happened at the Kerberos mission. As far as Lance and everyone else knew, Takashi Shirogane as well as Samuel and Matt Holt had crashed and died. The end.

So the truth came out, to a bunch of sixteen year olds who were too curious for their own good no less. Takashi Shirogane was alive, and well, being the curious kids they were, they just had to break him out of quarantine to know what happened. Obviously. Turns out they weren’t the only kids who had the same idea, and so there were four.

Lance, Hunk, Pidge, and Keith. That’s probably the moment it occurred to Lance as the night unfolded, that things were bigger than him for the first time in his life. It was like a crossroad. Hunk, Lance, Pidge, Shiro, and then Keith. The five of them at standstill in the blindingly sterile rooms, moving too fast to understand what they were even doing. What they were getting themselves into.

So a night of snooping gone uncovering a corrupt reality turned prison break. Within the space of a few hours. Of course. 

Of course more happens to Lance in the space of a few hours than has ever happened in the entirety of his life. It’s almost hilarious to think that a few months prior, the most eventful thing that had happened was beating the high score with Hunk on the DDR machine at the local arcade. But right then, Lance could barely recall what happened inbetween the escape, and then ending up in space. Next thing he knew was nothing more than the exciting lurch of his stomach as they left the atmosphere, and the stars which blurred as the moved. The only indicator of how fast they were really going. The child inside of Lance was crying, because no matter how many times Lance, Hunk, and Pidge had been inside the simulator back at the garrison, nothing could compare to the real thing. There should have been so many things on Lance’s mind, like what the heck was happening, for starters. But all he could really comprehend in the chaos was how entrancing the stars were.  
He’d think about the consequences of what happened later.

And so he was thinking about what had happened. What lead to them being here. At first everything moved too quickly. One moment they’re kids, squabbling and laughing in the mess hall, failing the piloting simulator and spreading gossip. Like kids do. Next moment they’re in space. They’re soldiers in a war they never should have been participating in. The only thing calling them to the fight was the fateful chance of being there in the first place, and the desire to protect their home.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter was edited, and I just handed in the assessment before (!) midnight!
> 
> I think this one is a bit shorter than the last chapter, but there will be more to come soon :)

When fantasies about aliens and princesses and superheros had been nothing more than fantasies, it seemed great. Lance can remember countless nights obsessing about the newest comics out with Hunk. Innocent eyes wide, dreaming improbable dreams. Because that’s what they are. Improbable dreams. Lance knew that the odds of him growing up to be a space pirate or a superstar weren’t exactly in his favour, but it was better that way. When fantasies stay as fantasies, Lance didn’t have to think about how, just maybe, chasing the stars might not be all it’s cracked out to be. Yeah, being a pirate in space who fought aliens and wins over damsels in distress may sound like fun at first, but it also sounds awfully scary if you take the time to think about it. The constant fighting, living without a moment of safety, always being on the run simply couldn’t be as fun as a kid think’s it is. But since Lance and Hunk were just kids reading comic books and playing astronauts, all that doesn’t really matter.

The fact that Lance and Hunk would have given almost anything to be where they are now as kids, is almost ironic. Lance hasn’t had the time to talk to Hunk recently. Well, they have talked. It’s all strategy talk and grunts in the heat of battle. It’s all talking about how they miss video games or the way strawberries taste on earth. All squabbles in the mess hall with the occasional banter in the training room. It’s all talking about everything but the things they probably will have to confront some day, but it’s simply easier to avoid for the time being.

Even if the tension is so thick that Keith could slice it with that fancy knife of his. 

Even if it’s clear that Hunk want’s to say something about it. He does this thing, where his mouth opens every so slightly, as if he’s about to say something important, before shaking his head and commenting on how the food goop tastes a little less gross today, even though Lance knows that Hunk has more on his mind than food goo. He want’s to say something to Hunk, they’re best buds after all, but Lance is afraid he won't find the right thing to say, so he leaves it for another day.

Even if Lance knows that Shiro sometimes cries himself to sleep after battles. The walls are so thin, but that’s another thing no one will acknowledge. Shiro’s been through enough, so not mentioning it is the least Lance can do for their leader.

Even if he knows that the reason Pidge stays up so late sometimes isn’t because of that new gadget she’s fiddling with. He knows that it’s if she’s given the chance to lie down, she’ll start thinking. Thinking about home. Thinking about her missing brother and father. Matt and Samuel had been on the mission with Shiro, but they hadn’t come home. Lance knows that he would be much the same if it was Maria and his mother, so he can’t do much, but carry her back to her room after she’s fallen asleep at her station, not mentioning it in the morning.

Even if every moment of not saying something pushes of his shoulders until he’s struggling to hold himself up at the end of the day. Even if he feels like he’s drowning at the thought of earth, of his family, of all he’s meant to be. Of all the thing’s he’s left unsaid and will probably continue to do so. Lance often retires to his room early under the pretense of needing his ‘beauty sleep’ but most nights he doesn’t sleep at all.

Not sleeping at all is better than the nightmares to come.

What will his nightmare be tonight? He’ll probably be forced to relive his last mission again. It wasn’t anything special. Anything he hadn’t seen before. A small and barely colonised planet which was inhabited by equally small aliens. The team had settled there for a few days to form alliances and some other political nonsense. It didn’t matter a lot to Lance, it was more like a break. They were on peaceful planet after weeks, months, maybe even a whole year now without having a moment to rest like this, and Lance was totally going to take advantage of this. There was even a beach. Sure the sky was pink and the water was a weird greenish colour, but it still reminded Lance of home in a way that wasn’t quite so painful.

The sun still shone down in rays, bouncing off of Hunk’s hair which was in desperate need of a haircut as they sprinted down to the shore. The sand was an aquamarine colour and had an odd texture, but his toes still sunk into it as they sat and watched the sunset, trying to build a misshapen castle with their feet alone. It was nice how Lance could almost forget about the war for once, and just sit with his best friend and watch the sunset. It was nice how they could pretend nothing had changed for once.

So they sat there. Fingers intertwined as the sun fell over the horizon, not uttering a single word. It wasn’t needed. Suddenly, home didn’t seem so far away anymore.

Of course things had been ruined rather quickly. The Galra must have been tracking their movements, and turned up not so long after. Warships ripping through the emerging dusk, and tearing through their false sense of peace. The night had quickly from almost pleasant to one of chaos and terror. 

He could never forget standing back to back with Hunk, surrounded in the grand dining hall they had been feasting at no less than a few varga ago at most. It was hard to see the once bright and cheery room be stripped of all light and warmth. Lance could barely stand to look past the end of his gun, aiming at enemy soldiers and trying to not focus on the fact that he was standing in blood, only daring to hope it was his own blood, rather than it being Hunk’s, or god forbid blood of one of the aliens who call this planet their home. So he shot, gun rattling in his hands, and eyesight blurring at everything bang.

He could feel Hunk’s rasping breath in his ear, and it helped to level him. While fighting was something Lance loathed, it was almost second nature to him by now. How many times has he fought back to back with Hunk by now? Too many to count. So they made it through the fight as they always did. There was still victory and adrenaline coursing through Lance’s veins as they were the last two standing. Lance still felt the joy of living through another fight, of knowing that at least Hunk was still safe beside him, but it wasn’t exactly as bright as it once had been. Like the room they were standing in, Lance felt void of life once again when Pidge shouted over the comns, jolting them back into harsh reality once again.

Over a hundred civilians had died that day. Even more homes had been ruined.

It came as a harsh reminder about the cruel reality they were living. This small planet had been pillaged because they had drawn attention to it by just arriving. They got their alliance and treaty, but at what cost? Everywhere they went, it was only becoming more apparent every day that past is that they only ever leave behind ruins and an alliance, a weak promise that they would help them fight against what was lost.

Yeah, that night will most definitely turn up in his dreams.

Although as heartless as it may seem, he’d rather take reliving that one night in his nightmares, than face the haunting and shattered memories of his home which happen to frequent his dreams night after night. He’d awake covered in sweat and with Maria’s name on his lips, feeling as if he hadn’t slept at all. It was becoming unbearable, and home was beginning to haunt his waking moments as well. He saw Maria in Pidge when she curled up on the sofa they pushed into the common room months ago, pouring over some altean novels in her spare time. Maria would love to read, so it left a sour taste in his mouth to watch Pidge.  
It seemed like everywhere Lance turned, there was a sharp reminded of everything that Lance lost back on earth. Shiro reminded him of his mother sometimes, with the clear and ever present authority in his tone which might as well scream ‘I know what’s best for you. Don’t question me Lance’. Keith who reminded him of Hunk’s older brother, with the not so playful bickering, and squabbles over meaningless things. 

And then there’s Hunk himself. The living reminder of everything he had left behind, those long days of sunshine and icecreams. Thunderstorms and pillow forts. 

Lance supposes he should probably talk to Hunk about this, but that would mean confronting the fact that every time he glances at his best pal, leaves a hollow feeling in his chest and the taste of metal on his tongue. It would mean that Lance would have to acknowledge the fact that chances were, he’d never return home, and Hunk was the closest thing he had to Earth left.

So Lance would do what he does best, and leave his feeling behind closed doors, where they wouldn’t burden anyone else. They all had their own problems anyway, and some things are best left unsaid.


End file.
